Lights, Camera, Action

In my junior year of high school, I was one of the Producers of the school's daily news show. Despite all of the high school drama, I don't regret a minute of it. Working closely as a team teaches you a lot.

Important life lesson: Don't Shit Where You Eat.

Coming out in high school is a trying experience to say the least. Having a crush on the captain of the football team, who has had sex with more high school girls than days you've been alive, makes it that much harder.

The winter months brought Student Emmy season upon the crew of our show. Everyone was scrambling to put their news stories together and run rehearsals for the big day. The stress levels were high, as were the hormone levels. Nick and Liz's break-up rocked the cast and crew and divided everyone into two sides. Everyone knew about my crush (without me having to say a word). It was pretty obvious. "Can I help you edit your segment for tomorrow?" I'd ask with a big smile.

We started the Emmy shoot on a Friday afternoon. After two hours of preparation, and three and a half hours of takes that were not up to snuff, Nick, our male anchor announced he had a party to get ready for and stormed off the set.

The crew murmured behind his back after he left and the terms "Prima donna" and "Asshole" were thrown around like ecstacy and weed at Amy Winehouse's house party.

Eventually, we agreed to meet at school after classes Monday to finish the shoot. Knowing the rhythm of the show, having the lighting set up and a fresh start would definitely make a difference.

There was only one problem:

Six inches of snow fell the night before and school was closed. Never ever had I cursed because school was closed before that day. I called Frankie, the sports reporter, in a panic. "Corey, just go see if any of the doors are open." Because I lived so close to the school, I walked over and eventually found that the loading dock doors were unlocked. A few quick phone calls brought the entire crew to school (on a snow day), and we shot the show in a half-hour.

We then opted to celebrate at the local California Pizza Kitchen, where Frankie worked. To help his sister (who was waiting on us), he took our orders. I had never been to CPK before and had no idea what was good, so I asked Megan, one of our reporters, who pointed out a pizza which I decided to order.

"What'll ya have, Corey?" Frankie asked.

"The sweet and spicy italian SAUSAGE pizza--"

Everyone stared as the words came out. Not realizing the double entendre until it was too late, I was a bit embarrassed... to say the least.

The next day was Valentine's Day. Joanne, one of my best girlfriends to this day, came to school in a black dress with black make-up and black jewelry. Her protest to this hateful holiday rang true for many of the self-proclaimed "TV Geeks," including myself. Ever optimistic, I came to school that day in a pink polo shirt, with felt roses for my best girl friends and little paper valentines for my talent and crew.

Between the previous day's shenanigans and my entering the TV Studio that day, it had come to my attention that Frankie was laughing at my expense, behind my back. "I'm Corey's valentine!" he'd announce to the vicious gossips I call "my friends." The fact that he didn't think the news would get back to me still puzzles me to this day.

He walked in the front door of the studio, coffee in hand and announced his presence. As he approached the 3-Camera Set-up, I spread my arms wide and said, "Frankie, thanks for being my valentine!" That's when I took a step to get closer, and to intimidate him a bit, and I tripped over a camera cord, knocking us both to the ground.

"WHAT THE FUCK, COREY?!"

That's when Devlen, our teacher, intervened. "Outside. Both of you. NOW." We left out the backdoor, with everyone staring. "WHAT WAS THAT?"

Then, something weird happened. We discussed why I was PISSED BEYOND BELIEF, when Meathead gave me a hug and said, "...But you ARE my valentine."

In retrospect, I should've known he was just appeasing me to diffuse the situation. But a kid can dream, can't he?

After graduation, we didn't talk. We were still Facebook friends. But it was understood that things were just too awkward for us to ever say anything to each other. I'll just file that one under, "Mistakes."